Listen to Her

So, about two weeks ago I took my children for their regular check up. Everything was fine until the doc announced they needed to get shots. My son had just turned 2 years old, so that was understandable but unexpected. She goes on to say he had missed his six month’s shots, so he would need to take those as well.

Could you imagine how huge my scowl was? That just didn’t sound right. I believed my son was up to date with his shots, which I told her, but she couldn’t find that information on her chart. I got this funny feeling in my tummy that fought with the idea that ‘maybe doc was right’. She should know what she’s talking about. This is her job. So, I nodded my understanding and they proceeded to give my son SIX shots; three on each leg.

First of all, let me tell you the look of devastation that ran across his face as I held him down to get these shots. It’s almost as if his eyes were saying, “Mommy, are you really going to let them do this to me? Aren’t you supposed to protect me”. I despised taking shots, and I feel even worse seeing my children get them, so you could imagine how broken my heart was having to hold him as they stuck six needles into his thighs (they couldn’t mix any of the vaccinations).

When everything was over, I picked him up, kissed him and whispered ‘Sorry’ into his ear. I knew it wasn’t my fault, but I still felt bad for him. He received a popsicle from the nurse, and I gave him Children’s Tylenol to help with the pain. Later that day, I shared with my husband what happened, and (with the same scowl I sported earlier) he said, “No, he got his six month’s shots”. That little tiny feeling started buzzing in my tummy again.

The next day, little Stephen woke up with his thighs swollen, walked with a limp, and had a slight fever. I expected as much, so I gave him Tylenol and lots of liquid. Surprisingly, he also had diarrhea. The day after that, he woke up the same way, but crying and whining more. After a few days the fever went away, but he was still nursing his left thigh and he had diarrhea.

After a week of changing a diaper of diarrhea a day, we knew something was wrong. Of course, we blamed it on one thing- getting an extra dosage of vaccinations he already had. By the second week, I blamed myself for not sticking with my gut feeling. There was no way he could have missed his six month’s shots. There was no reason for him to miss them. I thought about all the stuff I could have done differently, and wondered why didn’t I. I could have asked them to check our appointment history, I could have grabbed my copy of shot reports, I could have just said ‘No’.

I did take him back to his doctor and she confirmed he had a virus. I wanted to say, “Um, yeah. The one you gave him”, but I kept my cool. She told me to continue to keep him hydrated and add probiotics to his diet. At least I was doing that right.

What I regret not doing right was listening to my gut that day. As parents, there are things we will learn through trial and error. There may be decisions made because of being influenced by others. But there is also this instinct we will get deep down in our gut that says, “Hey! Red flag!”. Listen to it.

I was disappointed in myself for not listening to my gut, especially since it affected my son’s health; but like my sister- Juanita- wisely said, “There is nothing you could do to erase it. It happened, so use it as a learning experience”. If there’s anything I want you to get out of this, it's:

Listen to your gut. She knows what she’s talking about.